Couples Therapy in IL, IN, and WI
Rekindle Your Connection
You fight to grow your relationship and deepen connection with your partner, but no matter how hard you try, you always seem to end up in the same place: exhausted and lonely. You find glimmers of hope in moments of conversation but some days the pain and frustration in the relationship make you uncertain and question your compatibility with your partner.
You’ve tried giving ultimatums and constant reminders to your partner to find out if they care about you. You wonder why it’s so hard to just talk to each other and you worry about what that means for the future. You try to push away the anxiety at times but the worry and the pain come flooding back in with every fight and reminder of the struggle in the relationship. Talking about the problems goes in endless circles and not talking about the problems brings you anxiety and stress. You want help getting out of this cycle.
My name is Brandon, I am a couples therapist licensed in IL, IN, and WI and I can help.
I help Asian-identified and multicultural couples stuck in negative cycles to rediscover their partner and restore pathways to deeper connection. Together we will make sense of the stuck places in your relationship by slowing down to see what’s not working. We’ll uncover what’s truly important to you and your partner to find your way back to connection.
I don’t believe in worksheets for couples therapy because we’re going to make changes right there in the room together. When you take risks to make things better in your relationship, I want to be there to help. It’s biologically impossible to use skills and exercises in the heat of the moment when you’re scared, stressed, and flooded in a fight with your partner. We’ll work on creating new experiences in your relationship to establish safety that you can rely on to reach your partner in difficult moments.
I don’t take sides. I’m here for both you and your partner. Your relationship is my highest priority. I will guide your relationship process, help you both face your fears and worries in the relationship, and have the hard conversations you’ve been avoiding so you can rediscover the love between you.
For over seven years I have worked with couples struggling to find security and connection in their relationship. My clients typically see me weekly so they have consistent support and can move out of feeling like they are in crisis. I integrate Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy within the cultural lens of the Asian-American identity. Therapy can feel scary to start but it can also be a new beginning to the deeper relationship you and your partner are looking for.
How to Start Couples Therapy
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Submit a request for therapy by clicking here or on any of the "Schedule Consult" buttons on the website. I will contact you within one business day to set up a free 15-minute video call to talk about your goals and my process.
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Once we decide to move forward, we will schedule the first four assessment appointments. This is ideally done in the first week, but we can adjust as necessary for your scheduling conflicts. Our first session will allow me to better understand the goals and challenges in your relationship. The next two sessions will be individual for me to get to know your individual histories and families. The last assessment session will focus on understanding the disconnecting patterns in your relationship and making a final determination if we are a good fit for therapy.
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We will find a regularly occurring 90-minute appointment slot and start tracking your negative cycle. You will be challenged, but I also promise that we'll laugh together and you may even enjoy yourself as we do the hard but meaningful work of restoring your relationship.
Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples in Illinois, Indiana, and Wisconsin
Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) is a structured approach to couples therapy developed by Dr. Sue Johnson in the 1980s. It is based on attachment theory and focuses on improving the emotional bond between you and your partner. EFT aims to create secure emotional connections by helping you understand and express their emotions in a healthy way. EFT has been shown to be effective in improving relationship satisfaction and emotional closeness, making it a widely used and respected approach in couples therapy.
Resources
Secure Love: Create a Relationship that Lasts a Lifetime - Julie Mennano
This book is a comprehensive guide to building and maintaining healthy, long-lasting relationships. Drawing on attachment theory and research in psychology, the book explores the importance of emotional security, communication, and trust in cultivating fulfilling partnerships. It provides practical advice on fostering intimacy, managing conflict, and navigating the complexities of romantic relationships to create a strong foundation for lasting love. The book aims to help readers develop secure attachments with their partners and build resilient connections that withstand the test of time.
Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love - Dr. Sue Johnson
This book delves into the science of love and attachment, offering readers a roadmap to navigate the complexities of relationships. Drawing on Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), Dr. Sue Johnson outlines seven transformative conversations that help couples understand and strengthen their emotional bonds. Through these conversations, partners learn to recognize and address patterns of disconnection, fostering intimacy, trust, and resilience within their relationship. By guiding readers through these essential conversations, the book aims to help couples build a secure and enduring love that can withstand life's challenges.
Why Choose My Couples Therapy Services in Illinois, Indiana, and Wisconsin?
Finding a couples therapist that’s a good fit can be an overwhelming process in an already stressful time of your life. You may not be sure what makes a good fit or what will help heal your relationship, but you’re eager to find safety and relief again. You’ve searched over a dozen directories and there’s this gnawing feeling in your gut that you need someone who gets what growing up in an Asian culture feels like. You need someone who understands the pressures, shame and honor, and the complexities of family relationships.
At Hazakura Counseling, I strive to help you succeed in your relationship by integrating cultural humility and cultural influences in the therapy process rather than over-generalizing or avoiding them. You build the relationship you want because of your cultural experiences and identity, not despite it. We’ll explore together your experiences and identity as it shows up in your relationship. I adapt and tailor one of the most researched and effective types of couples therapy, Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, to your relationship and Eastern culture.
Take the First Step Towards a Healthier Relationship - Contact Me Today!
If you are done letting the negative cycle take over and are ready for a new beginning and rediscovery of your relationship, contact me for a FREE 15-minute consultation. Let’s work together to rebuild a stronger relationship.
Schedule your free 15-minute video consultation.
FAQs about Couples Therapy in Illinois, Indiana, and Wisconsin
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While all therapists can be trained to work with couples, a licensed marriage and family therapist receives specialized training to work with couples and families.
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There are many different kinds of couples therapy, but one of the most effective is Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFCT). Ninety percent (90%) of couples have significantly improved relationships and 70-75% no longer fit criteria for relationship distress after treatment. This is compared to a 35% success rate of the next leading treatment.
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Gottman, a leading researcher in relationships, found that 70% of couples who sought out couples therapy with a couples therapist experienced positive changes in their relationship. A well-trained couples therapist can help couples break out of unhealthy patterns and help restore connection.