EFT Therapist in IL, IN, & WI

Compassionate Couples Counseling for Lasting Change

What is Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)?

Emotionally Focused Therapy, often referred to as EFT, is a type of therapy designed to help couples reconnect and rebuild their emotional bonds. Developed in the 1980s by Dr. Sue Johnson and Dr. Les Greenberg, EFT focuses on the emotional experiences and attachment needs of both partners. At its core, EFT is about understanding and improving the way couples interact with each other, particularly during moments of conflict or distress.

In relationships, we often get caught in negative patterns of communication—those cycles where arguments seem to repeat, feelings get hurt, and we feel more disconnected from our partner. These patterns are usually fueled by underlying emotions and unmet needs, but they can be hard to see when you're in the middle of it all. This is where EFT comes in.

EFT works by helping couples identify and understand the deeper emotions that drive their behaviors. Instead of focusing solely on surface-level issues or conflicts, EFT dives into the underlying emotional currents. This process is done with the help of a trained EFT therapist, who guides couples through three main stages:

  1. De-escalation: In this first stage, the therapist helps the couple identify the negative cycle they’re stuck in. The focus is on recognizing the patterns that lead to conflict and understanding the emotions behind them. By doing this, couples can start to see their problems from a new perspective, reducing the intensity of their conflicts.

  2. Restructuring interactions: Once the couple has a clearer understanding of their emotional dynamics, the therapist helps them to communicate their needs and feelings in a more constructive way. This stage is about learning to express vulnerabilities and respond to each other with empathy and compassion. It's about creating a new, positive cycle of interaction that strengthens the emotional bond.

  3. Consolidation: The final stage is about reinforcing the positive changes the couple has made. The therapist helps the couple consolidate their new patterns of interaction, ensuring that these changes are sustainable and long-lasting.

How EFT Can Strengthen Your Relationship?

One of the reasons EFT is so effective is that it’s based on a deep understanding of human emotions and attachment. Research shows that EFT can help couples achieve lasting improvement in their relationships. Whether you’re dealing with ongoing conflicts, emotional distance, or the aftermath of a major life event, EFT can help you and your partner find your way back to each other.

EFT is particularly beneficial for couples who feel stuck in their relationship, unable to break free from repetitive arguments or feelings of disconnection. It’s also a great option for those who want to deepen their emotional connection and strengthen their bond.

Why Choose Hazakura Counseling for EFT in Illinois, Indiana, and Wisconsin?

At Hazakura Counseling, I understand how challenging it can be to navigate relationship difficulties. My approach is compassionate, non-judgmental, and tailored to the unique needs of each couple. I’m here to support you on your journey toward a healthier, more fulfilling relationship.

If you’re ready to take the first step toward healing and reconnecting, consider giving EFT a try. It’s more than just a way to manage conflicts—it’s a path to a deeper, more meaningful connection with your partner. Schedule a free 15-minute video consultation today!

Schedule your free 15-minute video consultation.

FAQs About EFT

  • Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) is a structured approach to couples therapy developed by Dr. Sue Johnson in the 1980s. It is based on attachment theory and focuses on improving the emotional bond between partners. The therapy aims to create secure emotional connections by helping partners understand and express their emotions in a healthy way. EFT has been shown to be effective in improving relationship satisfaction and emotional closeness, making it a widely used and respected approach in couples therapy.

    • Focus on Emotions: EFT emphasizes the importance of emotions in shaping interactions and relationships. It helps partners identify, express, and understand their emotional experiences.

    • Attachment Theory: The therapy is grounded in the idea that adult relationships are shaped by attachment needs. EFT seeks to create secure attachments by addressing fears of abandonment or rejection.

    • Patterns of Interaction: EFT identifies and modifies negative patterns of interaction that create conflict and distance between partners. It helps couples recognize these patterns and replace them with positive interactions.

    • De-escalation: Identifying negative interaction patterns and understanding the underlying emotions and attachment needs driving these patterns.

    • Restructuring Interactions: Encouraging partners to express their needs and emotions more openly and respond to each other in a supportive way.

    • Consolidation and Integration: Reinforcing new, healthier interaction patterns and preparing couples to continue using these strategies outside of therapy.

    • Enhance Emotional Connection: Strengthening the emotional bond between partners.

    • Improve Communication: Helping partners communicate their needs and emotions effectively.

    • Increase Empathy and Understanding: Encouraging partners to understand and empathize with each other's experiences and emotions.

    • Create Lasting Change: Developing skills and strategies to maintain a healthy relationship long-term.